Happy Halloween!

Well, so much for updating this blog on a regular basis.

Being that it's Halloween today and I have absolutely no plans to do anything, I'm feeling a little sad. Halloween was always one of my favorite holidays as a kid - and not just because of all the candy. There's just something festive about seeing fun halloween decorations, carving pumpkins, and dressing up that can make anybody nostalgic for their childhood. A few years back, we got into the spirt, and actually went to a pumpkin patch, took pictures, carved pumpkins, and dressed up for my best friend's Halloween Party. Last year, we also went to a costume party, but nobody we know was having one this year - unless they just didn't invite us!

Also, there's something to be said about living in Florida this time of the year. It's hit or miss, but honestly, it's just not the same when it's 87 degrees outside. When I was a kid, I remember it getting COLD on Halloween (COLD to a South Floridian is anytime the temperature dips below 75 degrees and the humidity drops under 80%). I can remember protesting to not wear jackets over our costumes. So thanks a lot, Global Warming. Also - did anybody else notice this...... we didn't set our clocks back yet? Yes - it IS getting darker earlier now - I do realize that, but Halloween is one of those nights where you can't wait for the sun to go down so you can hit the pavement - and for some reason, daylight savings time is delayed this year.

Anyways - because I'm feeling a little melancholy about not doing anything this year, I will leave you with a couple of photos from Halloweens past.

This on was taken in 2007. Honestly, it's so hard to find fun & unique "couples costumes." When you go to a party, there's ALWAYS a doctor/nurse, pirate/wench, or hippies there already. I tried to think outside the box this time and finally settled on Daphne/Shaggy from Scooby Doo (who I am holding in my hands, but somehow lost in my neon orange wig). My boyfriend basically rejected all my other fun ideas - Raggedy Ann & Andy, Strawberry Shortcake and the Peculiar Purple Pie Man of Porcupine Peak, and Hugh Heffner & Holly - so this is what we were left with. Sidenote - NEVER wear a wig - it's incredibly hot and itchy and it's hard to get it on good. I did a pretty good job on mine, and I'll give you my tips: have someone french braid your hair, tuck the tail under and then use one of those wig caps. Worked like a charm!

Here's a group shot of some of the ladies at this same party:

 

I mentioned that we carved pumpkins a few years back - this was that year:

Fast forward to 2009 (I have absolutely no recollection of what happened in 2008).  This year, I remembered the pain trying to find unique couples costumes from 2007 and just decided to give up the fight and pick up whatever was available that fit.  We went as a pirate (him) and a ladybug (me).  I also dressed up our puppy as a bumble bee - she was obviously THRILLED:

Unfortunately, we didn't get a big group shot this year, but here's a picture of Strawberry Shortcake, a NavaHOE Indian (the host), and me (the ladybug):

Unfortunately for my dog, I did get her a costume this year - she's going to be a little butterfly - because the bat wings I originally purchased for her were too large and had to be returned.  This was just a couple of dress rehersal pictures I snapped when she was trying to hide:

 Happy Halloween, Everyone!

Never judge a book by its cover

Well, I finally did it.  I took myself down to the library and got a card.  And then I turned into the asshole whose cell phone rings.... in the LIBRARY!  Where you could hear a pin drop!  And then I walked aimlessly around because I didn't know where anything was and my mind decided to go completely blank, rendering itself completely useless.  And God forbid I try to use one of the stupid new reference computers.  Can somebody please, please, pretty please bring back the card catalog and the old fashioned Dewey Decimel System before it was updated in 2003.  I know I only just turned 30, but damn! 

I finally managed to round up 4 books to check out and as I made my way to the check out area, I saw it.  The stereotype I pictured in my head.  The reason I have avoided going to the library in the first place.  The lady in front of me in line was the slightly overweight, pale skinned, woman in her late thirties, with her arms full of trashy Harlequin romance novels (you know - the ones made famous by featuring Fabio on the covers).  It took every fiber of my being not to throw my 4 books down and run out of the library never to look back.  But I didn't.  I stood my ground and tried my best to look as least like her as I possibly could.

After I checked out, I made my way out behind a somewhat short, rotund, young black guy who reeked of marijuana.  I took a deep breath, smiled to myself, and made my way to my car.... at least I learned a valuable lesson today:  bibliophiles come in all forms these days.

While We're on the Subject of Books.....

I feel like sharing a list of some of my all time favorites - and this is my blog so that's exactly what I'm going to do. 

To Kill a Mockingbird - by Harper Lee

What can I say about this novel that hasn't already been said?  It's basically the best piece of literary genius that's ever been written.  If it wasn't for Mrs. Vogt in my 9th grade English class requiring us to read this book over Spring Break, I would never know the passion I have for this piece of work.  I remember that Spring Break vividly.... I flew to Aruba to spend the week with my dad who was working there (pre-Joran Van der Sloot--you know, back when Aruba was a safe place for teenage girls to vacation).  The day I flew there was the day of the Oklahoma City bombing - April 19, 1995.  Since we only got 3 English channels in the apartment - HBO (which was playing The Sandlot, my absolute favorite movie!), CNN (which was only covering the Oklahoma City bombing), and some local channel (which didn't have any news to report, because Joran Van der Sloot was a mere 7 year old boy who had not yet begun slaughtering young girls) - I begrudgenly picked up my tattered copy of To Kill a Mockingbird and absolutely fell in love.  I remember laying by the pool while my dad was at work and just devouring this novel as fast as I could.  If you haven't read this novel - you're an absolute idiot and should run out right now and buy a copy because you'll definitely want to keep it when you're finished.

Twilight - by Stephenie Meyer

Laugh all you want, but I loved this book.  I read all 4 in the series - actually, I lied - I read the first 3 and 3/4 of the last one but didn't like it as much and never felt compelled to finish it.  But the first novel - Twilight - was great!  Give it a chance if you haven't.  I honestly don't know anybody who's read it and didn't like it - so that should be a good enough incentive.... and if you did read it and you didn't like it - well re-read it because there's something wrong with you!


Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office - by Jen Lancaster

Seriously, if the title doesn't make you want to read this memoir, then I don't know what will!  Jen Lancaster is hilarious!  She says the things that I think and publishes them in books!  I laughed out loud throughout this book - like seriously LAUGHED.OUT.LOUD!  I've read 3 of her other memoirs and I'm waiting to get her most recent one as well - and none of them disappointed.


The Art of Racing in the Rain - by Garth Stein

I bought this book to take on vacation with me, but then I made the mistake of starting it the weekend before I left and I could not put it down.  I read over half of it in one sitting and then finished it off the next morning as soon as I woke up.  THAT is how good it is.  I laughed, I cried, and I seriously felt like a better person after I read it.... not to mention that I still can't look at my dog the same way after having read this novel.  If you're a dog lover like I am, this is a must read.... and even if you're not, you should read it anyway. 


Yummers - by James Marshall

This was my absolute favorite book growing up.  I never owned it - I would like to purchase a nice copy now so I will have it for my own children, but I used to check it out at the library every single time my mom would take me to the library.  It's a simply written and illustrated children's book, but there is just something very special about it.  If you have young children, you should take a look, and if you're a kid at heart, you should give it a shot too!


Ramona Quimby, Age 8 - by Beverly Cleary

Another favorite from my youth.  The Ramona series was a favorite of mine once I graduated into "chapter books" and could read on my own.  Ramona always managed to get herself into trouble, yet she remained a lovable heroine as we watched her grow up.  Oddly enough, my favorite chapter in this book is the one when Ramona throws up in the classroom - go figure!  These books were written years ago, yet are a true testament to the universal appeal of the characters as they remain as popular as ever.  They're even coming out with a Ramona movie - and you better bet I'll be first in line to see it!


Marley & Me - by John Grogan

Another dog book - but it was SOOOO good!  Much better than the movie!  I grew up with a black lab who was NOT named Marley.... yet I laughed and laughed and laughed as I read this book - remembering what it was like when she was a puppy.  Yes, the book is sad at the end - SPOILER ALERT - the dog dies.  But don't they always?  The book as beautifully written and you can tell how special Marley was to the Grogan family just by the way the author told his story. 


Confessions of a Shopaholic - by Sophie Kinsella

My guilty pleasure - snarky-British-chick-lit!  I devoured this book - I don't know why it took me so long to break into the Shopaholic Empire - I can't wait to read the second book (as soon as it arrives - courtesy of Amazon) and I'm looking forward to renting the movie and curling up on the couch one night to watch it.  I just loved absolutely everything about this book and the way it was written.  I just felt lighter and happier when I finished reading it!  And did you know that the author's name isn't really Sophie Kinsella?  That's just her pen name (you know, like Mark Twain and Dr. Suess).  Her real name is Madeleine Wickham - and she's also published novels under her real name!  I'm excited to start reading those as well! 


Something Blue - by Emily Giffin

This novel is the sequel to Something Borrowed.  Don't get me wrong, I liked Something Borrowed, but I LOVED Something Blue.  What I loved the most about this book is that the author took a character that everyone hated in Something Borrowed, and turned around and actually made you like her and relate to her.  I'd been less than pleased with the first Emily Giffin book I read, but I'm glad I gave her another chance! 


Baby-Sitters Club Super Special #10 - Sea City, Here We Come - by Ann M. Martin

My absolute favorite series when I was young was the Baby-Sitters Club.  I remember that I would go to the bookstore with my mom and race to the section where these books were, and I was usually allowed to buy 2 of them (they were $3.99 each at the time).  The Super Specials were my favorite because they were longer, and they told the story from each character's perspective and almost every chapter began with a hand-written entry.  I remember liking this book especially because they went to the beach and a hurricane hit - and growing up in South Florida, that's definitely something I could relate to.  I still have a soft-spot for these books and recently found out that there was a Super Special released that I never owned where the baby sitters went to Europe and I'm really tempted to order myself a copy and read it now as an adult! 

This list will have to be continued at a later time because now I have the urge to read - wonder why!

Well-Read Failure!

FAIL, FAIL, FAIL!

Well, shame on me!  I failed at updating this blog, I failed at the photo challenge I was so excited about, and I've basically just been a big lazy failure!  Oh - and it's official - I'm 30 now.  PITY PARTY FOR ME!!!

In other news.... I've been really into reading lately.... books that is.  I like books.  I like to hold paper, smell the ink (sometimes the mildew), and turn the pages.  I'm not into all that fancy electronic crap - the Kindle, the Nook, The iPad - BLAH!  Nothing can take the place of a good old fashioned paperback in your hands.  I noticed that I tend to read a lot of fiction, some "chick-lit," and I have a soft spot for memoirs - which is ironic, considering I never thought of myself as a big fan of autobiographies or biographies in general.  I've read some really good books, and some really awful ones.

Since I prefer to own all my books (unfortunately the ones I hated also) rather than check them out from the library, I have developed a love affair with http://www.amazon.com/.  I could browse all day and I thoroughly enjoy clicking through the 45 pages of recommendations I am presented with every day because I get a real kick out of seeing that Amazon recommends I purchase "Are You There, Vodka?  It's Me, Chelsea" and "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: The Complete First Season."  And you know what?  Amazon has really hit the nail on the head with it's recommendations - I'll tell you that.  They can read me like a book - no pun intended!

Anyway - so I have this new obsession with Amazon.  I also have a life-long obsession with sharing my opinions with others whether they want to hear them or not, so recently I started leaving reviews on Amazon.  If you want to read them, and I suggest you DO, here is the link:  http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member-reviews/A32F7XPPKIILVC/ref=cm_cr_pr_auth_rev?ie=UTF8&sort_by=MostRecentReview

So, like I was saying - I like to share my opinion, but lately I've gotten really consumed with checking all my reviews (sometimes multiple times a day) to see if people have found them "helpful."  If someone reads your review and likes it, Amazon asks if they found it helpful: yes or no.  If you click yes, it shows up.  If you click no, it shows up also and I get SO OFFENDED when someone clicks no!  I know it's silly, but it bothers me because obviously, I am always right so I don't understand how anybody could dare disagree with my opinion and/or not find my insight helpful! 

Well, that's all I've got tonight - off to unwind and read!

I'm Participating!

In this......

http://photohuntchallenges.com/

I stumbled across this randomly. I may or may not have been blog stalking when I came across it.  I can't confirm those details..... BUT it seems like a fun way to get out and start using my camera.  Here's the monthly list of challenges.  Think of it as a sort of photography scavanger hunt....

• A Different Point of View
• A Perspective Shot
• Touch
• Taste
• Sight
• Sound
• Smell
• Sign of Spring (or autumn)
• Flowers
• A letter formed/found in nature (Examples)
• Trio
• Fish
• Water 
• Skyward
• Mother Earth
• Something Rare
• Something Healthy
• Something Colorful
• Something Spicy
• Something Triangular

So if you're interested in taking part also, you should!  I already have some ideas, but I'm sort of stuck on some others - mainly "a perspective shot."  Are we talking something like all those famous Leaning Tower of Pisa shots?  I'm totally at a loss, but I'll think of something interesting!  Anyway - that's all I've got for now!  Wish me luck!!

Cilantro is the Devil

I personally have a deep rooted hatred for cilantro (aka coriander).

People look at me like I'm absolutely crazy and I've lost my mind if it ever comes up in conversaion.  I find it hard to believe that people actually like that crap!  My friend Jen even has a cilantro plant - apparently she can't get enough of the stuff - meanwhile, I can smell the stuff and lose my appetite.  It's hard to believe we're even friends.

I recently stumbled across this article in the NY Times...... when I say "stumbled across" I mean I googled the phrase "I HATE CILANTRO" and it came up.  My hatred of all things cilantro is no secret.... as within 12 hours of actually finding the article myself, 2 friends e-mailed me a link to the article.  Here's the link: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/14/dining/14curious.html.  It says something along the lines of people that hate cilantro associate the taste with a soap/lotion taste.  I've never actually willingly eaten lotion so I don't know if that's what I would compare it to, but I've always said it reminds me of a sort of chemical-like flavor - sort of what I would imagine cleaning products are made of.  GROSS.YUCK.NASTY.

Ever heard of a fast-food type restaurant called Chipotle?  Well, I've personally decided to boycott their nasty food.  Why?  I innocently ordered a rice/bean/chicken burrito.  Upon taking ONE bite, my gag reflex kicked in.  They mix cilantro into their rice - and they have the nerve to brag about it on their menu (see website for poof!).  WHAT THE HELL?  If you know me, you'd know that I love rice and beans.  Love isn't even a strong enough word.  I have an intimate relationship with the stuff.  CAN'T GET ENOUGH.  And everyone always raves about how delicious Chipotle is and how I had to try it.  It would figure that Jen (cilantro-plant-growing-whore) would be one of those people.  Until they have a plain white rice option, I swear to NEVER let their nasty-ass-disgusting-cilantro-laced food touch these lips ever again.  EVER. 

I bet you're thinking that I don't like salsa, right?  Well - WRONG.  I love salsa, but it presents me with a real dilemma.  I can't just dig my tortilla chip in and grab a scoop full.... I have to dip and scrape and make sure that all those little green devil flecks are nowhere near my tortilla before I ingest it.  If anybody knows of any yummy salsa without cilantro, please do tell!   

There is a point to this rambling, and this is it:  CILANTRO SUCKS ASS.  And you suck if you like it - because I said so!

The Scariest Movies.....EVER!

While engaging in viewing The Last Mimzy on TBS over the weekend, I started to reflect upon movies I've seen (some in my youth, others as an adult) that really scared the crap out of me!  The Last Mimzy wasn't scary, per se, but I believe it's a children's movie, and I have to admit, if I was a child, it would probably have frightened me. 

Move over The Hills Have Eyes and Paranormal Activity, take a step back Blair Witch..... THESE are the scariest movies ever (according to ME!)

Outbreak.  IT.COULD.HAPPEN!  For some godforsaken reason, this movies terrifies me to the core.  To my very being.  Yet, any time it's on, I insist on watching it in its entirety - albeit wrapped in a blanket like it's a cocoon (speaking of cocoons... see below).  There is nothing creepier then watching a very shaggy Patrick Dempsey step off a plane, sweating like a pig, and start spinning in circles while his girlfriend screems JIMBO!  Nothing more alarming then watching germs spread like wildfire throughout a movie theater.  Nothing as disturbing as watching people die as they bleed from their eyes.  I am NOT a fan of movies involving any diseases, plagues, etc. and this one definitely tops my list of one of the scariest!

Cocoon.  I saw this movie as a child.  I've never rewatched it.  My comprehension of this movie is very slanted and blurred, and I'm totally okay with that.  It was creepy.  Bad visual effects to say the least, but all I remember were these cocoon thingies at the bottom of a swimming pool.  And old people.  Super creepy.

The Wizard of Oz.  Never liked it.  It's scary...... munchkins, tin men, scarecrows, witches?  It's all just too much.  Tornados - storm cellars?  Auntie Em, Toto.... no thank you!  I don't know why this is such a cherished children's movie.  Gave me nightmares.  People melt.  Awful.

Return to Oz.  What made people think a movie like this was appropriate for children?  As if The Wizard of Oz wasn't bad enough, they "RETURN" to Oz.  Scared the crap out of me.  I watched this in school - must have been in 1st grade or so.  NOT APPROPRIATE.  I remember a part about an insane asylum.  I remember that the yellow brick road was destroyed.  And then..... the scariest things of all time - WHEELERS.  Odd rollerskating legs with Medusa-esque hair.  And then the part with the chick who would change her heads?  WTF were these people thinking? 

The Fly.  I blame my father for this one.  It was on TV when I was about 6 years old.  I have vivid memories of playing with my toy kitchen accessories on the couch with my dad while he watched this movie.  Of course my mom was out for the night - God knows she would never have allowed me to see this movie.  Dad; however, didn't think it bothered me, so he let me watch.  I remember watching this man morph into a fly like being after getting stuck into a weird machine with one.  I remember watching his ear fall off and what I can only describe as an egg yolk type thing come out of his mouth.  I HAD NIGHTMARES FOR MONTHS!  I would lay in my bed, wide awake, all the way down under the covers, sweating, but too scared to come up for air. You can imagine my dismay when I saw that this movie was showing on The Disney Channel.  Not family fun!  No no no! 

Child's Play.  I had a "Kid Sister" doll - she was "My Buddy's" female counterpart.  Chucky had a strange resemblance to My Buddy which was a very popular toy among my friends at that age.  Needless to say, Kid Sister found herself burried at the bottom of my closet shortly after seeing this movie.  I'm not sure why there were 341 sequels.... I guess people have a sick obsession with dolls. 

Resident Evil.  I don't DO zombies.  I don't do elevators and decapitations.  And I most certainly don't do wicked creepy British children who keep repeating, "Kill her, kill her now.  Kill her, kill her now," over and over again.  Oh, and I most certainly don't do Michelle Rodriguez.

Pulse.  Talk about a B movie from 1980-something.  I believe the Lawrence brothers (Joey and Matthew) were in this movie when they were very young which is the only reason I've ever seen it.  Apparently I had a weird crush thing on them when I was younger.  But, I digress.  From what I recall, the house the family lived in had some type of electrical problem and basically all their electrical appliances and such were trying to kill them.  I remember they had one of those creepy Felix the Cat clocks on the wall (the one where the tail goes back and forth and the eyes move) and at one point, the mom was in the shower and it locked her in and tried to scald her.  I showered with the bathroom door open for months in case I needed to call for help and wanted to make sure somebody in the house could hear me.

The Peanut Butter Solution.  I have saved the best for last.  There were times in my life when I honestly thought I had made this up or dreamed it somehow.  But I have discovered that it was in fact a children's movie.  Whoever made this movie (for kids) should be shot.  This kid goes into some house that burned down that homeless people died in and basically got scared to the point where his hair fell out.  Then he sees the ghosts of the people who died and they tell him how to make this peanut butter solution to put on his head to grow his hair back.  Of course, his hair won't stop growing, and his friend even uses some of the solution to put in his nether regions.  Then some wacked out art teacher kidnaps the kid and makes him eat yogurt so he can cut his hair and make some magic paintbrushes in this sweat shop he runs.  Blah blah blah, it was incredibly disturbing and haunted me for years.... especially since nobody I talk to seems to have any memory of this wacky movie.  But it exists.  Through the magic of the internet, I have come to find I am not alone in remembering this movie and thinking I dreamed it up.  You can watch it online.  DO IT.  I dare you.  You won't look at Skippy peanut butter the same ever again.

Dear Lady Gaga....

We need to talk.  I don't get you, and dare I say, I'm probably not alone.  What's with the outfits and the creepy persona?  We've seen it all before - and we've seen it better.  For starters, you're not a starving artist, you rocketed to the top of the charts at the tender age of 23, and you'll probably never know what it's like to struggle to make something of your life... so stop acting so eremitic at every event you're asked to attend.  You should be grateful, so suck it up and start acting like a human being instead of a circus side show act. 

Might I remind you, despite what you may think, you sing POP music.  And not only is it pop, it's dance music.  Your tunes are on thousands of bar mitzvah d.j.'s playlists, and nerdy 13 year olds everywhere go crazy when "Poker Face" blasts through the speakers in their middle school cafeteria during their Spring Fling. 

Kylie Minogue mastered that genre more than decade before you, and she was super cute and likable.  She didn't pretend to be something she's not - her music was corny and shallow just like yours, and it worked for her.  Amazingly, nobody ever thought she was a man either (I wonder why), so maybe you should take down some notes from her on how to dispel those nasty rumors.  Embrase your corny music, but please stop acting like you're God's gift to songwriting.

Let's move on to Björk.  You're not her, so get out of her reject closet.  Until you rock dead poultry as a dress, you will never have the type of shock-potential she is capable of.  Stop trying.  It's just awkward and flat out ugly - but not dead-swan ugly - that was just genius!

Next up... Cher.  Leave her headdresses alone.  Don't try to compete, because Cher will always win!  She's about 168 years old and she looks better than most teenagers I've seen.  And unless you're BFFs with her plastic surgeon and he'll fix you up like he did her, stop gluing shit to your face.  It's bad for your skin and it clogs pores, and I don't want to see you go down the road Jessica Simpson and Avril Lavigne did (and don't even get me started on Katy Perry) and start peddling Proactiv solution on TV at night during all the "after-hour television" programming once your career hits rock bottom.  But I digress...... where were we?  Oh yes, Cher - you'll never garner the same amount of attention she gets from heterosexual sailors, although you are high up on the totem pole of women (98% sure) the gays adore, and you don't even have a lesbian-turned-man daughter named Chastity/Chaz.  So props for that achievement. 

In closing, please lose the gimmicks, the costumes, the self-righteous-attitude, and the general ridiculousness because quite frankly, I want to punch you in the face.  Kylie, Björk, and Cher all did it WAY better than you.  You're not shiny or new..... so come up with your own niche and stop being such a copy cat.  I could go on and on, but I'm tired, and I'm pretty sure you catch my drift.

Regards,
Snitz

P.S. - Not even gonna lie - I jam to some rah-rah-ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma, gaga oh-la-la - so my advice comes from a good place.  Shape up, Lady Gaga.... before you ship out (hopefully not with Cher and her sailors at the helm).

GYM should be a 4 letter word!

If you know me, it's no secret that I hate the gym.  Scratch that.  I despise the gym.  Don't know why, I just do.  Yet, I pay $29 a month to be a member of 24 Hour Fitness - and believe it or not, they don't even have one of those cards to go on your key chain so I can flash it around and try to show off like all the losers that pay $35 a month to be a member of L.A. Fitness.  How do I know this, you ask?  Because I used to pay $35 a month to go to L.A. Fitness - even though it was 20 minutes from my house (therefore making it much to far for me to actually waste my time with) - and I had one of those super cool key chain cards to show off with. 

When I quit L.A. Fitness - which was no easy task, let me tell you, I vowed to never join another gym unless it was 24 Hour Fitness and only because it is literally right across the street from my house.  I could walk there.  I don't.  But I could if I wasn't lazy.  Luckily for me, memberships at 24 Hour Fitness were ridiculously priced - something like a $549 down payment and $55 per month.  SO.NOT.HAPPENING.

Well - as luck would have it - I learned they were running some kind of ridiculous special - $29 down, $29 per month - no contract.  Needless to say, my boyfriend and I have now been proud members of 24 Hour Fitness for the past several years.  We used to go to the gym all the time.  Together.  We'd start with cardio, and then he'd force me to do weights with him which is just so embarrassing for some reason.  Probably because in order for me to lift anything over 8 lbs, shaky arms are involved - which is sooooo E-M-B-A-R-R-A-S-S-I-N-G.  I even went to the gym by myself (like once or twice).  On those instances - or on days where I just said NO to weights, I would do the elliptical for an hour straight.  Just me and my iPod - more on my relationship with my iPod in a later post. 

Then I took up spinning at my gym.  It sucked at first - there's no way to sugar coat it.  My crotch felt like it was bruised and swollen.  But eventually you get used to it and it doesn't hurt (which is slightly concerning/alarming at the same time).  I ditched my traditional workouts for spinning twice a week.  I left each class sweaty and disgusting, but I felt good.  Try as I might to lie, it worked.  I felt better about myself, I had more energy, I even ate a better diet because I hated the idea of eating a bunch of crap food after I just busted my ass for an hour to burn off those calories.  I would spin every Tuesday & Thursday night, but then found a trainer I liked better and would go every Wednesday and Friday (yeah Friday - I'm a loser, what can I say).  I even hit up some Monday classes and an occasional Thursday.  I was bad ass.  And I felt good.  I noticed a vast improvement in my physique: my legs felt stronger and tighter, and I liked how my clothes fit me.  Blah blah blah.....

Then we got a puppy and my exercising took a back seat.  I felt bad about leaving her at home so I started cutting my Friday spin class and only went on Wednesdays.  I still felt good though.  Not as good, but not noticeably different.  Somewhere around Thanksgiving I got a little lazy.  I remember going to class on Wednesday night before Thanksgiving, but I can't tell you if I went at any point in the month of December.  On the Sunday after Christmas this year, my boyfriend and 2 of our friends went mountain biking together, and I may or may not have fallen on the warm up trail and slammed my knee into a rock.  And said knee may or may not have bled, bruised, and swelled to twice it's normal size, and may or may not have been excruciatingly painful for weeks.  I'm neither confirming nor denying the incident, I'm just saying..... busted knee = NO SPINNING!

My boyfriend's been bugging me to get back into the gym, but now that it's been almost 3 months, I just don't want to go.  No desire.  Instead I loaded my freezer full of Lean Cuisines that taste about as yummy as the box they are packaged in.  (I briefly contemplated picking up an eating disorder to drop a few pounds, which.... no.  I love food too much to be anorexic and I hate throwing up, so bulimia was out).  The truth is, I don't feel so good anymore.  I feel jiggly and pudgy.  I hate the way my clothes look on me (not to mention how they feel - I've never had a muffin top, but lately I've been dangerously flirting with acquiring one) and I refuse to buy new clothes because I don't want to encourage this new body to stick around.  I got on the scale the other day and saw a number I've NEVER seen before.  NEVER IN MY LIFE.  But still..... I don't want to go to the gym.  I feel like I have to lose weight BEFORE I go back.  I don't know why - it's a vanity issue I assume...... but it's the cold hard truth.  It's kind of like those people who tidy up their house before they have a professional come to clean.  Or people who self tan before a vacation at the beach (yes, I do that too - shut up). 

The moral of the story is - the gym SUCKS, but if I ever want to feel better about how I look, I need to get my ass in check and get back in there.  As much as I complain about everything gym related - the smell, the people, the confusing machines, etc., it's really not THAT bad...... once you get back into your grooooooooooove.  I just need to find my groove............. wish me luck!

Coming back for a second season?

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!