GYM should be a 4 letter word!

If you know me, it's no secret that I hate the gym.  Scratch that.  I despise the gym.  Don't know why, I just do.  Yet, I pay $29 a month to be a member of 24 Hour Fitness - and believe it or not, they don't even have one of those cards to go on your key chain so I can flash it around and try to show off like all the losers that pay $35 a month to be a member of L.A. Fitness.  How do I know this, you ask?  Because I used to pay $35 a month to go to L.A. Fitness - even though it was 20 minutes from my house (therefore making it much to far for me to actually waste my time with) - and I had one of those super cool key chain cards to show off with. 

When I quit L.A. Fitness - which was no easy task, let me tell you, I vowed to never join another gym unless it was 24 Hour Fitness and only because it is literally right across the street from my house.  I could walk there.  I don't.  But I could if I wasn't lazy.  Luckily for me, memberships at 24 Hour Fitness were ridiculously priced - something like a $549 down payment and $55 per month.  SO.NOT.HAPPENING.

Well - as luck would have it - I learned they were running some kind of ridiculous special - $29 down, $29 per month - no contract.  Needless to say, my boyfriend and I have now been proud members of 24 Hour Fitness for the past several years.  We used to go to the gym all the time.  Together.  We'd start with cardio, and then he'd force me to do weights with him which is just so embarrassing for some reason.  Probably because in order for me to lift anything over 8 lbs, shaky arms are involved - which is sooooo E-M-B-A-R-R-A-S-S-I-N-G.  I even went to the gym by myself (like once or twice).  On those instances - or on days where I just said NO to weights, I would do the elliptical for an hour straight.  Just me and my iPod - more on my relationship with my iPod in a later post. 

Then I took up spinning at my gym.  It sucked at first - there's no way to sugar coat it.  My crotch felt like it was bruised and swollen.  But eventually you get used to it and it doesn't hurt (which is slightly concerning/alarming at the same time).  I ditched my traditional workouts for spinning twice a week.  I left each class sweaty and disgusting, but I felt good.  Try as I might to lie, it worked.  I felt better about myself, I had more energy, I even ate a better diet because I hated the idea of eating a bunch of crap food after I just busted my ass for an hour to burn off those calories.  I would spin every Tuesday & Thursday night, but then found a trainer I liked better and would go every Wednesday and Friday (yeah Friday - I'm a loser, what can I say).  I even hit up some Monday classes and an occasional Thursday.  I was bad ass.  And I felt good.  I noticed a vast improvement in my physique: my legs felt stronger and tighter, and I liked how my clothes fit me.  Blah blah blah.....

Then we got a puppy and my exercising took a back seat.  I felt bad about leaving her at home so I started cutting my Friday spin class and only went on Wednesdays.  I still felt good though.  Not as good, but not noticeably different.  Somewhere around Thanksgiving I got a little lazy.  I remember going to class on Wednesday night before Thanksgiving, but I can't tell you if I went at any point in the month of December.  On the Sunday after Christmas this year, my boyfriend and 2 of our friends went mountain biking together, and I may or may not have fallen on the warm up trail and slammed my knee into a rock.  And said knee may or may not have bled, bruised, and swelled to twice it's normal size, and may or may not have been excruciatingly painful for weeks.  I'm neither confirming nor denying the incident, I'm just saying..... busted knee = NO SPINNING!

My boyfriend's been bugging me to get back into the gym, but now that it's been almost 3 months, I just don't want to go.  No desire.  Instead I loaded my freezer full of Lean Cuisines that taste about as yummy as the box they are packaged in.  (I briefly contemplated picking up an eating disorder to drop a few pounds, which.... no.  I love food too much to be anorexic and I hate throwing up, so bulimia was out).  The truth is, I don't feel so good anymore.  I feel jiggly and pudgy.  I hate the way my clothes look on me (not to mention how they feel - I've never had a muffin top, but lately I've been dangerously flirting with acquiring one) and I refuse to buy new clothes because I don't want to encourage this new body to stick around.  I got on the scale the other day and saw a number I've NEVER seen before.  NEVER IN MY LIFE.  But still..... I don't want to go to the gym.  I feel like I have to lose weight BEFORE I go back.  I don't know why - it's a vanity issue I assume...... but it's the cold hard truth.  It's kind of like those people who tidy up their house before they have a professional come to clean.  Or people who self tan before a vacation at the beach (yes, I do that too - shut up). 

The moral of the story is - the gym SUCKS, but if I ever want to feel better about how I look, I need to get my ass in check and get back in there.  As much as I complain about everything gym related - the smell, the people, the confusing machines, etc., it's really not THAT bad...... once you get back into your grooooooooooove.  I just need to find my groove............. wish me luck!